Chuck Norris Jokes > Chuck Joke 607

Chuck Norris Joke #607

In fine print on the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.

Funny :) Not Funny :(

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2014-08-20 04:35:32

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2014-08-20 04:35:15

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2014-08-10 05:46:33

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2014-08-10 05:46:32

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2014-08-10 05:46:30

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2014-08-09 01:34:40

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2014-08-09 01:34:40

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2014-08-09 01:34:39

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2014-08-03 22:52:23

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2014-07-30 18:01:25

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2014-07-30 18:01:24

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2014-07-28 10:07:04

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2014-07-28 10:07:03

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Chuck Norris Jr.

2012-05-03 14:49:59

hi

georqa

2012-02-26 20:24:53

HOW MANY PUSH-UPS CAN CHUCK NORRIS DO? ALL OF THEM

santos007

2012-02-13 12:36:38

the world wasnt created by god it wuz created by chuck norris's beard

bob

2011-11-16 17:41:20

they originally made the wall of china to keep chuck norris out. it FAILED miserably

randy Moya

2011-10-09 14:12:15

The grass is always greener on the other side. Unless chuck norris has been there. Then it is covered in blood and tears of his enemies

chucken norris

2010-12-19 14:23:17

always check ur closet for chuck cause he may kill you in ur sleep

Miguel

2010-12-17 17:11:09

Once chuck norris was in the army but they let him go when he never took a weapon into battle

big boy

2010-12-13 18:03:50

ya i know what i said but itsa okaaayyyy yo ucan thank me now

joseph

2010-12-13 17:59:24

chuck norris counted to infinity twice

joseph

2010-12-13 17:57:36

mirror mirror on the wall whos the baddest of them all

nummmmmmpa

2010-11-16 02:44:33


Chuck norris can still pwn n00bs when he is AFK

nummmmmmpa

2010-11-16 02:42:48

WARNING: Santa does not watch you chuck norris does.

nummmmmmpa

2010-11-16 02:32:30

chuck norris can win a staring contest even though he is not competeing in it

nummmmmmpa

2010-11-16 02:26:54

chuck norris once beat the hell out of a kid, that kid was david bekham , he is now chuck norrises right habd man

nummmmmmpa

2010-11-16 02:24:04

chuck norris is so ugly he could literaly breake a window

nummmmmmpa

2010-11-16 02:17:52

chuck norris was bitten by a snake , three days of excrutiating pain ...the snake died

jonnybravo

2010-11-04 16:55:53

God called the two greatest men on earth: Mr. T and Chuck Norris. He said to Mr. T," Why should i take you as my right hand?" Mr. T said," I pity the fool who doesn't take me as His right hand." God said it wasn't a good enough reason and banished him to hell. God truned to Chuck Norris and said," Why should i take you as my right hand?" Chuck norris responded with a roundhouse kick and a note god received in the hospital. It said: " Bitch, you were in MY seat."

Jeremiah

2010-04-29 20:17:56

When Chuck Norris does push up he doesn't push himself up, he pushes the world down.

Trout

2010-04-02 20:55:08

Chuck Norris simply walks into mordor.

Lewis

2010-04-02 15:02:32

When Chuck Norris falls into a lake, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet, water gets Chuck Norris

Halomaster

2010-04-02 15:01:51

Chuck Norris CAN touch MC hammer

Halomaster

2010-04-02 15:00:27

Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone

Halomaster

2010-04-02 14:58:00

Chuck Norris is so awesome he can do a wheelie on a unicycle

Halomaster

2010-04-02 14:55:52

When jesus came back to earth and said, "I am gods son." Chuck Norris came up, round-house kicked and said," Your not my son."

daniel

2009-12-19 14:37:16

spiderman runs up a wall, chuck norris runs through walls

Mark

2009-03-04 14:51:36

LOL

Tyler Eller

2007-05-05 18:34:03

I don't believe in the theory of evolution, Chuck Norris decides who lives and dies...