Chuck Norris Jokes > Chuck Joke 299

Chuck Norris Joke #299

70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris' weight is his dick.

Funny :) Not Funny :(



2015-04-06 12:00:26



2015-04-06 12:00:25



2015-04-06 12:00:24



2014-10-25 05:28:42



2012-11-27 10:18:33

chuck norris never lost his virginity because he never loses

Robert Flores

2012-08-25 10:40:51

Chuck Norris could never be a warden, because He takes no prisoners.

rIKceieey &boghbdesQE

2011-11-30 14:05:31

joe needs you chuck norris


2011-09-14 13:27:09

funny i didnt think anyone on this site had penises just uteris BRUTALLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!


2011-08-29 17:17:13

The only one who cried while Chuck Norris was being born was the doctor...

ally marshall

2011-04-07 01:36:38

chuck norris goes in to crowded bars and flings axe kicks about,willy nilly


2011-03-02 10:39:32

mosses walks on water, chuck norris swims through land.


2011-03-02 10:37:55

a snake bit chuck norris, after 3 days of excusiating pain the snake finaly died


2011-03-02 06:57:03

Everyone who knows that guy stay away... Anyone who's over 70, still roundhouse kicking and has 10,000 jokes made up about him, should inspire fear in anyone.

chuck norris

2010-12-19 05:46:05

If the devil knocks on my door i'm going to my lab to grab my Chuckzooka


2010-11-18 22:10:17

freddie if Chuck Norris finds your comment he will roundhoues kick you to the face.


2010-10-18 08:44:44

Chuck Norris is a wuss


2010-08-05 18:42:50

That's really gross...

But get this!
A McDonald's employee once denied Chuck Norris a McMuffin. So he stepped outside and roundhouse kicked the building and turned it into a Wendy's

josh culltin

2010-05-06 08:01:00

chuck norris isnt hung like a horse...a horse is hung like chuck norris


2010-04-14 10:20:41

The big bank theory was proven wrong when archeologists found the young chuck norris' diary explaining the day he lost his virginity. Apparently as the adolescent chuck norris climaxed the young lady was blown into a billion pieces to form the earth...this is why we call her "Mother Earth"


2010-01-22 02:34:43

A snake once bit chuck norris, it groaned and died of venum


2010-01-22 02:33:08

Chuck norris once step on quicksand, the quicksand could not escape and drowned

Tucker whittington

2009-11-11 16:24:26

I hope a girl wrote this

A person

2008-08-23 23:26:19

Many supposedly 'crazy' people committed suicide right before the turn of the millenium in 1999. They were not crazy. They just didn't want to die in Chuck Norris's new millenium drunk round house kicking celebration rampage.


2008-04-23 03:34:55

Chuck Norris's dick is so big it has its own dick, and that dick is still bigger than yours


2007-12-09 16:48:41

Duct tape? Chuck Norris doesn't need Duct tape. If something breaks, he'll just give it a roundhouse kick and knock it back into place.


2007-10-25 11:59:39

oh, and

Chuck norris was taught how to roundhouse kick before he was taught how to walk


2007-10-25 11:56:13

here's some of my jokes

the term "one man army" came from chuck norris

One day, chuck norris accidently bumped a huge tower with his arm. This tower is now known as the Leaning tower of Pisa

the Coming of Jesus was supposed to happen when Chuck Norris was born.

people commit suicide because they're afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck norris.


2007-07-24 10:18:35

there are 2 teams in a war. 1 of them are the blue team. the other is the red team . the blue team has 1 million poeple. the red team has 1 person. thats chuck norris. the blue forfits


2007-07-24 09:50:44

y did all the dinosours die. chuck norris came


2007-07-24 09:45:40

if the devil nocks on your door let him in if chuck norris nocks on your door run.